Accepting good for others

Everyone is good at something; you may be good at one thing and one may be good at another thing. When we are not good at a particular thing or did not do well at something and someone else did, we sometimes feel bad and upset. Feeling upset that you didn’t do well or are not good at something is natural as we want to do the best we can. However, the problem is that if our upset feelings lead us to envying and refusing to accept another’s success. Not accepting a person’s success such a friend, sibling, neighbor, colleague or classmate creates envy towards the individual who reached the success. Envying affects us in a number of ways can leave us empty until we mend ourselves away from it.

When we are envious we are less focused on our lives and focus on other’s lives, we monitor their every move like if it was our own life. We praise the slightest affliction that hits them and envy their successes, we backbite them, slander them and we use abusive sarcasm towards them. We think that we are belittling them and our actions are hurting them but really we are hurting ourselves in ways we do not perceive. When we are chasing after others, we spend time waiting for the latest news about them and backbiting and slandering them as these habits are created by envying someone. The time we spend on others and their faults and successes is time we could be spending on ourselves, we rest, spend time with family members and so forth and use our time to our advantage.

Secondly, it makes us feel inferior and we feel that this person has more than us. When we envy someone it is because we believe they have something we do not, thus belittling the faith we have in ourselves and the happiness we have for the things in our lives. We feel that our lives are incomplete and lack reflectance for the blessings around us, we fail to see that if someone has something, we may have something they do not. We become people with become people with little confidence and self-esteem because we are not proud with ourselves and see another individual better than us while they may not be exactly. We fail to understand we have our own talents and skills that we should develop because we lack the motivation to do so.

Thirdly, we lose the people around us because we can’t accept their successes and achievements, we belittle them and indirectly ridicule them and they begin to realise that we are not what they hoped we would be and begin to cut their ties with us because no one wants to be with such a person. We become completely isolated and become surrounded with people similar to us and makes it difficult to mend our ways.

That is why the prophet (s.a.w) said to beware of jealousy and envy, because it can cause us so much harm than we think. Furthermore, why envy someone when you want to be congratulated and praised for your successes and achievements. Learn to accept others successes because we are all different and have different talents, if a person is good at something you are better at something else. We can’t be good at everything, so accept someone else’s achievements just as you would want people to accept your successes.