Negative effects of Marriage problems

Marriage is a blessed and fabulous thing, but it can only be this if it contains harmony and love. Marriage problems are not the prettiest things to see or hear about, constant arguments, disputes and grudges. However, marriage problems also play a deadly effect on our well-being in terms of health, daily living and our social interactions, but the can also play a toll on those closest to us who care and want us to be happy and thrive. 

Marriage problems on health

Our health is a reflection of us and our moods and emotions can either keep our health the way it is or effect it negatively, depending on what emotion we are feeling and expressing. During marriage problems, you are constantly worried, upset anxious or angry and these emotions aren’t the best emotions for your well-being. Your worried for your marriage, your kids, your upset that your once upon a time happy marriage is not what it used to be, your anxious for the future and what is left for your marriage and your angry of the way you have been treated, betrayed and the lack of loyalty. These are common the common things that go through people with marriage problems which are okay to be felt at this difficult time. However, it is not okay at the same time, your emotions are playing a war against your health and it is not a very light war. You feel exhausted, your blood and heart pressure raises when you get angry, you may begin to lose weight and fatigue and stress will be written all over your face due to personal neglect. What you used to enjoy doing such as favourite hobbies become a tool to ease the pain than for fun and entertainment and when they can’t do that you completely give up on it.

You deprive yourself from smiling as your mind and heart are constantly filled with worry and thoughts, thoughts of how is this all going to end, in a good way or bad, if bad what will the future look and any other thoughts you may have. These emotions weaken you and you feel the old things you used to do easily are a chore now. Your frustration causes you to say things you regret to those close to you and then you regret saying them which increases your pain

If your problems were hidden and no one knew about them, the toll these negative feelings play on you hint to others that you are not what you used to be and are suffering from something, which they may ask about. Marriage problems are not easy and are very exhausting and tiring, we are in confusion and disarray and so is our body. It has to deal with different emotions being felt at once along with your personal neglects due to worry and concerns.

Your condition does not affect only you

Many of us believe that if we do something irresponsible or are suffering from some problem that it only affects us and nobody else, well, that isn’t true. Anything we do or happens to us effects those around us when they find out, whether directly by us telling them or if they find out indirectly through other means. People say that if you can’t feel what a person is going through, you can never clearly sympathise for them because you have not felt it. That is not completely true, those who hold you closest to their hearts feel for you all the way, they want you to be happy and if they do not see this it hurts them as much as it does you. They worry when they see different changes in your attitude and that your calm happy face is fatigued and carries concerns. You may feel that if they don’t know they will not feel any unnecessary concern, but once they see the slightest change in you, their worry begins and they can tell when you’re not being yourself. During your marriage problems there are a number of people who will get effected, your kids who want to see both their parents live together in a harmonious marriage. Your problems affect them the most, they love the both of you can’t live without the other, they develop their own worry and fear for the future as the both of you. They begin to think of life without the other parent and the emptiness it will bring and even though they may be just kids to you, they want to see their parents happy and enjoying their life. The prophet said:

“Whoever fails to show mercy to our children and honor to our elders is not one of us.” [Sunan al-Tirmidhî (1919)]

This shows that mercy to children is vital and the we can show love and mercy to our children is to keep them as far away from marriage problems and disputes as possible. Your parents will be affected as they want to see you reach your full potential in life because that is what they raised you for, to be happy and achieve all the dreams you had as a little child. Your closest friends who love you like they love themselves will feel for you because they want you to feel happy and enjoy your life, they feel your pain as it was hurting them and don’t want you to feel hurt or upset.

As we can see, marriage problems are not just constant arguing and fights, they have a devastating effect on a person psychologically and physically. Your mind is not at rest and it plays a dangerous game on your physical well-being to an extent that people know something is dead wrong. It affects those who hold you dearest to their hearts, who want to see you happy and be the person you are. They worry as if it was them going through this and try to help in any way they can. Thus marriage problems aren’t something we should lead ourselves towards, we have to be wise in our dealings and be able to solve our problems in a maturely way.

We must be able to deal with our problems in a way that makes us remember that a continuation of disputes can lead to a path that harms us physically and mentally and can leave a scar on our loved ones, especially the kids. That is because they live under the same roof of the two people in the dispute and their disputes can impact on their development greatly.